At times you may be overwhelmed with the amount of work you have to do. this may cause you to blame yourself and trap yourself into negative thinking blaming yourself for not being able to manage the work. If you feel stuck and unable to move forward then it becomes necessary to pause and revisit the work you are doing and decide on what requires to be done immediately based on its timeline and/or importance.
This is where your emotional intelligence has an important role to play. Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and manage emotions. It makes it easier to control your thoughts, feelings and emotions. There are two simple ways to stop thinking negatively and move forward.
Use the Blue Dolphin rule to stop negative thinking.
It is a well-known fact that when you try to suppress certain thoughts, often it will increase its frequency. this is called “the white bear theory”. what we want to forget or suppress is what will come to mind repeatedly.
To overcome this, you need a blue dolphin. A blue dolphin is a replacement thought process by which you can immediately change your focus whenever you are compelled to think of thoughts that you wish to suppress.
Replace “I can’t do this ” with “This is tough but I have to try it”.
Replace “Another failure” with “What do I learn from this?”
Use the Milk Carton rule to move forward.
The Milk carton rule is very simple. When a problem happens repeatedly, (warm milk for cereal), look for alternate solutions (buy 2 cartons of milk, 1 will always be in the fridge and cold as required for the cereal).
In such cases ask yourself the following questions:
- What is in my control?
- What is it that I cannot control?
- What action can I take to solve the problem or reduce my unhappiness?
By taking action on what you have control over and having alternatives you can tide over the problem you face rather than worry over factors on which you have no control.
Hence, when you are faced with emotionally distressing situations remember the above rules to cut through the logjam within your head, stop complaining and move ahead.
Emotionally Intelligent People Use 2 Simple Rules to Stop Negative Thinking and Move Forward
By Justin Bariso
INC 2023/06
R2G 